calmy is so craved

hi,this is lazy sunday,really. haven't taken any bath yet it's 5pm already. 1001 night cynthia's blast at JW was great.
also having a quality taim w miago heheee <3 have discussed something about 17teen w mom. she said it's a significant moment and blabla. i'm in her cage. everything i'll do should be confirmed. even the tiny thing like this is taken care of her. this question is always surrounding. when i could do something by myself? by my own decision? could decide something by my own? yet she's the one i love the most :(
really don't think so & i never get what she meant. significant & quality moment are depend on who you're celebrating w. not because huge of humans come to your party and so on. some say i'm weird or what else. don't like crowdy moment,place.
prefer sitting in the corner alone. i feel so annoyed of noisy all around me,you're the one will be stared at. oh-faint! just like you play dinner dash,all you hear is noise.
i'm feeling like want to plug something in their mouth. peaceful,calmy place is the one i crave the most. i think like oh seriously :(